31 March 2005

Bearing with it.

- Where do you find your strength? asked a friend. I really don’t know. Sometimes you do feel strong but most of the time you’re far from it. It’s a bit like the incredible Hulk, I suppose. When it’s really needed, you find powers within that you didn’t know you had. Hidden away in some spare energy tank inside. Good thing you don’t have to turn green and tear up your clothes.

There are times when it feels as though our part in all this is the easiest one. Compared to people around us, that is. It might sound weird. Abbe’s our little baby and obviously the fear and pain dig the deepest into our hearts and souls. But having said that, we’re right in the middle of it. We get to see him all day everyday, we get first hand information on his condition from the experts and we also receive the comforting that they’re so good at. We’re constantly working on it. Our loved ones receive messages on how he is and then they’re left there. With all the worry but without the help that we get.

Of course we have trouble finding that strength at times, but we’re doing all right. There’s no choice. You can’t quit; you have to bear with it. Being there for Abbe and finding the strength to give our other son as normal a life as possible. To comfort each other and be strong for our loved ones. We have to be prepared for setbacks and keep looking ahead. And we have to believe that Abbe will be okay and that one day soon he’ll be coming home with us.

How I look forward to that day.

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